Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator made them ‘male and female, ‘ and said, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning . . . ” Matthew 19: 3-8 (Emphasis provided).
Heavenly Father, we pray that as we gather around Your Word to study, Your Holy Spirit might be present to teach us how to live according to Your will. In the name of Jesus we pray. Amen.
This is a challenging topic. It is both challenging and painful. I observe people from day to day, living with the anger, and frustration, and a lack of self esteem, that results from a broken relationship. Some people never seem to get over the experience. I do not believe in divorce. And I try not to impose my belief on others. Certainly, in the case of a divorce, it is the man or woman who is going through it, who alone knows what he or she is suffering. As we study together, may the Holy Spirit open our eyes to what goes on behind the scenes, and what we can do to share with others, some of the solutions offered in God’s Word.
Our Scripture for today contains perhaps the biggest piece of the enigma, “the hardness of the human heart.” The Bible says that the purpose of the Pharisees’ question, was to “test” Jesus. I wonder what they expected Jesus to say. It is most likely that they wanted Him to say something contrary to the law, so that they could accuse Him of “breaking” it. What He actually did was explain to them the true meaning of the law – its essence. He took them back to “the beginning,” where God made of the two, one. “Therefore, what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
Their question revealed a lot about their character. “Can we put away a woman for “any” and “every” reason?” It was more like asking, “Do we even need a reason for a divorce?” That is what the act of “putting away” had come to. Any and every reason was good enough to ask your wife for a divorce. Now what would make a man do something like that to someone he once professed to love? To get married to a woman and when he believed he no longer had a need for her, he simply put her away, for “whatever” reason. Did they realize how destructive an act like that could be? Especially for a woman who has been “put away” several times? Someone like the woman at the well, “You have had five husbands, and the one you have now, is not your own” (John 4: 18). Only men could do the “putting way, in those days.” In our day, both men and women, can file for divorce. Oftentimes, it is because the heart has become hard.
But Jesus who had created both male and female, in His image, knew the worth of a soul. “That is not the way it was in the beginning.” I never intended for you to put away the wife of your youth! You cry your heart out because I no longer look at, or accept, your offerings. You ask why? I will tell you why: “It is because the Lord is acting as the witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not the LORD made them one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because he was seeking godly offspring. So guard yourself in your spirit, and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. “I hate divorce,” says the LORD God of Israel . . . ” (Malachi 2: 13-16a, NIV).
The hardness of one’s heart manifests itself in many ways, especially in acts of selfishness. When Jesus explained to them, that if they put their wives away for any other reason beside marital unfaithfulness, they would be committing adultery, the disciples response was: “If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry” (Matthew 19: 10). Once it affected the males’ status, they would rather have no part of marriage! These were the disciples who had been with Jesus, taking this stand!
“The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it (Jeremiah 17: 9)? We will continue our conversation, tomorrow.