“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift. . .” Matthew 5: 23, 24, NIV.
Dear God, please help us to accept that You always know what is best for us. And help us to always be willing to obey You. In the precious name of Jesus we pray. Amen.
We hear a lot about forgiveness; and it is usually about granting and receiving forgiveness. The emphasis is on forgiving others so that we may receive forgiveness from God. Not much is said about how to proceed when you are not aware that You have offended someone, yet in their opinion, you have. The only text that I have found dealing with this situation is this passage tucked away in the Sermon on the Mount. This is not an easy situation to deal with. I believe it is harder when you know that you have done nothing wrong and must go to your brother or sister to ask for forgiveness. At least if you are aware, that you have wronged a brother or a sister, asking his or her forgiveness is in order. When you have not intentionally offended someone, asking forgiveness is almost as if you were admitting that you did something wrong! Nevertheless, if Jesus asks us to do it, rest assured that there is a blessing or blessings, involved. Let us identify some of these blessings:
It sets the other person free. If someone has been hurting because of something you did inadvertently, you want to put an end to their pain. The word of God admonishes us, “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Galatians 6: 2). Many of us are willing to bear other people’s financial and emotional burdens, but how many of us are willing to bear the burdens of misunderstanding, created by something we said or did? The attitude is usually, “Well I did not do it purposely, so why should I apologize?” Precisely, because you did not do it purposely! The next reason is perhaps the most important, because Christ ask you to do it! The fact that He asks us to “leave [our] gift . . . in front of the altar,” and go and make the wrong, right, with the person, before offering our gift, shows the urgency with which we should deal with the situation. If we can tell the person honestly, that we never had any intentions of hurting them, and that we are sorry, I believe it reveals our desire to heal, and not to harm! Therefore, it should be easier for the other person to heal.
It sets us free. Paul’s admonition to the followers of Christ who find themselves in this situation, is the following: “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4: 2, 3, emphasis provided). We are to bear with each other! Each of us are to see ourselves as the one who should make the first move. As human beings, it is not the norm that we be humble. But if we are to be called by Christ’s name, we are to walk as Christ walked. The night He was betrayed by Judas, knowing that Judas was going to commit this crime against Him, He went to Judas and washed his feet! He knew that Judas had “something against [Him,]” but Jesus went to him just the same! Even though Peter denied Him, after His resurrection, Jesus did not wait for Peter to come and apologize to Him, Jesus sent a personal message to Peter to meet with Him ” ‘ “But go, tell his disciples and Peter, ‘He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you” ‘ ” (Mark 16: 7).
You may say that Peter’s situation is not exactly the same as the one mentioned in our Scripture. However, the ability to humble one’s self to someone that you have not wronged, is to “walk as He walked” (1 John 2: 6). There is always a blessing in store when we do things Jesus’ way. ” ‘ “Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them” ‘ ” (John 13: 17).